Is your spouse a serial murderer? Do they kill time and time again, and take joy in it? Do they revel in death and despair? Do they like to kill slowly, and drool over their victim’s desperation? Or, do they kill quickly and savor the power of dealing deadly blows with speed and great precision?
For many of us, our spouses are serial murderers. Not of people, or animals, or even lowly insects. They are the serial murder of ideas, of hopes, of dreams, and of ambitions. They rejoice in their power over our lives. To, with one or two simple words, or even with a sideways glace, quickly take the gleam out of our eyes and the excitement out of our hearts.
They kill with phrases like “That will never work”, or “You are wasting your time”. Their almost silent sigh can often turn a live and vivid goal into the ghost of a wanton dream. A simple shrug of their shoulders carries the power of Thor’s hammer in dealing death-blows to the that great enemy, the need of their spouse to feel successful.
Unfortunately, dealing with the serial murderer of ambitions is no more easy than dealing with the serial murders of humans. Although often justified, the death penalty is certainly inappropriate. Besides, we love this serial murderer. Just as a parent of a serial murderer of humans loves their child and would continue to do anything in the world for them. You love your spouse, and would do anything in the world to make them happy. Even suppress your ambitions.
There must be some way that you can fight back. Some way that you can protect your self-esteem from this abuse. Some way that your next dream can be safeguarded from being the next victim. There is.
The best way to handle this situation is though slight-of-hand. Instead of telling your spouse that you will become so rich off this idea that you will be able to hire Bill Gates to clean your toilets, play on his or her emotions and logic.
The first strategy is telling your spouse that you are bored, and that this opportunity will be fun for you. It will give you something to do outside of the day-to-day chores, and allow you to meet new people which you have something in common with. Explain that to you, this is no different than their hobbies like fishing, pro-ball games, or wood working. And, certainly less expensive. That leads me to the next point:
Compare the expense of the opportunity to the expense of some of their hobbies. A bass boat may cost as much as $25,000. Tools for the work-shop can cost hundreds a pop. A ball game can easily cost a family of four well over $100. But, for less than the cost of one very nice meal out each month, you will have something to do that will bring you enjoyment, allow you to meet new people, and after a few months, might even pay for itself or make a profit.
If nothing else, chasing your dreams will bring you happiness and self-esteem for very little financial cost. Isn’t your happiness worth that to your spouse?
Finally, if nothing else works, withhold sex, or demand sex. Whichever your spouse finds the most distasteful.
Brande and Chris Bradford are active participants in a home based business opportunity and are the publishers of GREAT HEIGHTS, a monthly newsletter focused on home based business issues. To subscribe to their newsletter, send a blank e-mail to: Great-Heights-Subscribe@yahoogroups.com or visit: http://www.brandebradford.com
