Google has lots of uses for all the extra bank when their “pi” in the sky 14+ million shares hit the market.
How should Google spend all that cash? AdSense system improvements? Pay-per-call initiatives? A Mac version of Google Talk? Ring in with your views at WebProWorld.
MediaPost’s SearchInsider considers the potential use for an extra $4 billion in pocket change by the Googleplex. Writer Gord Hotchkiss sees Google building a war chest to take on Microsoft over the “choke point” Redmond controls: the operating system.
Doubtful. Microsoft is too entrenched and too wealthy to take on head to head like that. Four billion is roughly a tenth of what Bill Gates is personally worth. Imagine what could happen if he decided to make a “strategic investment” in Google’s new offering.
Larry, Sergey, and Eric would get away with their cash, but there would be a lot of new baristas and cabbies in Silicon Valley appearing in the work force with titles like “project manager – Google” on their rsums.
But if Mr. Gates declines to really make writing stories about the tech industry truly enjoyable with that purchase, Google has a few ways they could use all that new money to confound Redmond.
Google could purchase every gas station around Microsoft’s Redmond campus. They could continue their practice of using mathematically significant numbers to price gas per gallon. Every day, the price goes up to the next prime number. Or Google prices it on a sliding scale. Janitors and groundskeepers get discounts; Kai-Fu Lee’s replacement pays a 10,000 percent markup.
Every college student and job recruit visiting Redmond would meet a friendly Google rep who would offer a simple exchange: if Microsoft has made you a job offer and you’ve accepted, we’ll give you $1,000,000 to work there for two weeks and then quit, and go on vacation for a year instead. Imagine Steve Ballmer asking his HR recruiters why 4,000 new hires decided to turn their backs on the company.
When Windows Vista hits the shelves, Google has pre-orders placed for over 22 million upgrade versions, based on CDW’s $179 price for XP Pro upgrade, at every possible sales outlet they can. Then Google returns every single unopened copy for a refund. Then starts the purchase/return cycle again.
Who knows, maybe they’ll just use the cash to hire U2 and REM to play at Google Dance next year. Or build a new stadium in Los Angeles, call it the Google Dome, and buy an NFL franchise. That would give them 8 home dates, plus potential playoffs and Super Bowls, played with so much Google advertising that NASCAR drivers would blanch at it.
After all, it’s all about the advertising.
David Utter is a staff writer for murdok covering technology and business. Email him here.
